


The Shine of a Miracle:The Delusion of One's Self

by Readers_Street



Series: The Third Law of Aquors [1]
Category: Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Depressing, Depression, F/F, Fluff and Angst, References to Depression, Self Confidence Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-16
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2018-12-02 19:19:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11515761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Readers_Street/pseuds/Readers_Street
Summary: Riko Sakurauchi had always thought she was boring and somewhat plain in this world. Being unable to experience the happiness within it, but when she transfers to Uranohoshi High school her view begins to change.





	1. The Beginning of Nothing

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there fellow readers and writers. I am the owner of Reader's Street and hope you enjoy.

Riko Sakurauchi had always thought that she was a bit boring, just a bit plain. She had learned that fact at just the young age of 5. She could still remember that day clearly.

Riko had been sitting on a bench in a small park in Tokyo. Watching all the other children running in the wood chips, playing in the sand. She saw all those children laughing and smiling with the happiness of youth, but the most important thing, they were in groups. Packs, herds, that's what they were. Together laughing and smiling as Riko sat alone, swinging her short legs back and forth, curiosity in her eyes, a look of puzzlement on her face.

"Why am I the only one alone?", she wondered. The girl had been wondering this for some time. Why she didn't seem to have any friends in elementary school, why her classmates looked at her with reluctant eyes, why she was alone now instead of being like the rest of them. Squinting and leaning forward looking at the youth, Riko continued pondering with an observant eye.

Then she noticed, everyone within their groups were together, but individual. Each one of them played a role in that group. The natural, optimistic leader and the leader's wing man, the person who supported and backed their ideas and actions, but still had their own unique personality. There was always that pair within each group with other children being drawn towards them, filling others roles to make it complete. That's when Riko knew. Knew an assumed truth. She was alone... because their was nothing special about her. 

What made her special? Why didn't kids become friends with her? All those questions that had been swirling around inside her head had all been answered. The first answer was nothing. She had nothing that made her truly special. Sure, she had began taking piano lessons, but all she had seen what real professionals could do, their fingers dancing along the keys, gravitating the audience to listen further. She looked up to them with awe. Now, she knew she couldn't become one, someone special and shining.

The answer to her second question was zero. She had zero friends because of the first answer. She was not special, so people didn't bother. Riko Sakurauchi learned that day that she was just another face in the crowd of Tokyo, a blur in the background soon to be forgotten.

Ever since that day that is what she thought. Her parents supportive words that she was likable and loved? Lies, they just didn't want to lose her. Her piano teacher telling her she had a knack and talent in it, that she should compete, because she could win? Lies, on Riko's side, it was just her effort and on the teacher's, she was just another paycheck. Lies filling the air, trying to choke her, bring about her demise. That's what Riko heard.

 Lies, lies, lies. From her parents, teachers, everyone. Everyone lied to her, pretending she was something she wasn't. Pretending she was worth their time. Pretending to bring her up, only to force her back down further.  So she fought back, she kept on forcing her truth upon them, denying their lies, denying she was special, denying she was worth anything until they gave up saying them all together. Those words had finally stopped. After all those initial years of them being heard and repeated, believed even. All that was left was silence...and her thoughts.

Riko's thoughts, thoughts of that day. Riko's thoughts, thought to be true, Riko's thoughts, becoming true.

She was nothing and she had nobody. She was alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again. Thank you for finishing this chapter. This was actually supposed to be a single story to the beginning of the series, but the idea grew a lot larger. I promise the second chapter will be longer. Still, I hope you enjoyed it none the less. This is actually my first writing on this site, so I apologize if it is a bit rough around the edges.
> 
> Also, if you wouldn't so mind, I would appreciate it if you posted a comment about what you thought, since there's always room for improvement. I often look over and re-edit my work, so even things such as the title isn't set fully in stone. Thank you once again for taking time in reading this, and I bid you good day.


	2. A Sinking Feeling

It had been 10 years since then.

10 years of believing her assumed truth. 10 years of being in self enforced solitude. Riko listlessly gazed out the window, watching as the scenery of Tokyo's buildings pass by. She was now going to transfer to a new school out in the countryside. In Riko's case, she was glad. After what happened at Otonokizaka, after what she did...or what she didn't do, she couldn't go back there. She couldn't meet their hard gazes...but...

_Wasn't it their fault for choosing someone like her?_

No. It was her own fault for being mundane. Plain. Unimportant. A failure. She was the problem. Now the problem was going away. Riko smiled at this thought. She was happy for the school. For being rid of their problem. Having it fade into the background until it was forgotten in everyone's mind. Just like herself. These thoughts had plagued her mind for years ever since that day, but unlike most people, whose thoughts about themselves were fleeting, swiftly entering and leaving like the scenery passing by, Riko was different.

Such thoughts as those remained, lingering like an after image before being stored, being ingrained into the depths of her mind. She has been storing every single thought about this for the past 10 years. Thoughts of the truth so she remembered. So she never forgot. These thoughts, thoughts of nothing have become a subconscious haze in her mind, clouding all other ideas and judgements. The scenery by now had changed from the cold geometric buildings of Tokyo to a vast number a sea ports, with the ocean's waves splashing up against them. Before her eyes were also rolling hills filled with greenery and the trees swayed in the wind and ocean breeze. She was here. Her new start at nothing. Uchiura.

 

It was evening by the time Riko had arrived, the setting sun reflecting off the clouds creating pink hues in the sky, the strong breeze now only a gentle whisper blowing in her ears and through her long burgundy hair. She could see just the beginning hint of stars sprinkling the sky as the day was at last drifting off to sleep as night. It was beautiful. Riko had  never seen a sight quite like this, a sky where you could see the stars.

Riko began to walk along the beaten pebble road, looking around and taking in her new surroundings, breathing in the fresh open air. She continued to wander around until she came across a single pier, stretching out into the ocean's far waters. Approaching it, Riko walked down the worn, wooden planks until she found herself directly at the piers edge. Kneeling down, Riko stared into the water's only to be met by darkness, a bottomless void. During the bright days of Summer, the ocean would glisten with the sun's rays, making it's entire body sparkle like a royal sapphire.

However, as the sparkle of the sun set, the ocean's true colors came out. Dark midnight blues of waves came up, threatening to swallow up anything that dared to enter it's waters, to pull them down to a bottom which cannot be seen. This was the true nature of the ocean, a bottomless void. A world of beauty and the waters of darkness meeting each other every evening before the entire world went to sleep, meeting as twilight become midnight, when dusk turns to dawn. Meeting at these piers every day for eternity.

 

As these thoughts entered Riko's mind, a single question had entered her conscious...

 

_What would happen if the ocean was given nothing? If the ocean was given herself?_

 

This new land was beautiful, a large contrast from the geometric buildings of tokyo that confine you like a criminal, being surrounded by stone or concrete, carbon dioxide swirling around and entering your lungs with every breath. However this land was too beautiful. Too beautiful of a gift for someone who was nothing. She shouldn't have a right to live in and use this area's resources. She shouldn't have the right to a fresh start.

She was to forever be in the background, a failure, a nothing...and she deserved it, because that's who she was. So what would happen if the ocean swallowed nothing? As she leaned in closer, on the very ends of her feet she wondered. Would the ocean just spit her back out onto the shore, rejecting her because her value was nothing? Or would it take Riko in and show her true bottom of it's floor? Letting her be swallowed in it's waters, letting her be forgotten by all. By now she was teetering back and forth with the breeze of the ocean, hypnotized as it's waves inhaled and exhaled slowly, matching her own breath to the ocean's. 

 

It seemed as if fate had been waiting to long for Riko's answer, becoming impatient and deciding to interfere with her destiny. By fate's hand, a strong breeze was sent, sending a shiver up their victim's back before a forceful shove. Being suddenly wrenched out of her trance, the burgundy hair girl jumped at the sudden sensation and discomfort. Losing her balance from shock and the wind, Riko fell into the water with a splash.

 

The water was...cold. Gripping to her clothes, her hair, her skin, it made Riko feel heavy, pulling her down further. The icy touch of it's fingers sapping the strength out of her, taking away her ability to swim. She felt herself going deeper, writhing in pain as water entered her lungs, her body struggling in vain, trying to breathe, trying to live. She opened her eyes fighting the sting of the salt, trying to see any glimpse of light, only to be met with the darkness from the depths of the ocean's waters.

Being dragged down further still, Riko had given up all signs of struggling. No one would come for her, having been pulled too far to be able to go back. She was at the point of no return. She was nobody at all and yet...why? Why did she still want to live if she was nothing? She herself knew that she was nothing, that she didn't matter. She was the one who came knocking on Death's door when she looked over the peer. She chose this!...So why did she not want to die?...Why did she still have hope? Nobody saw her fall. Nobody would come save her. Nobody would care if she died. So...why?

 

With these thoughts, tears fell from Riko's eyes, rolling briefly off her cheeks before becoming one with the water surrounding her. She didn't know...She wanted to know! But her time was nearly up. As she continued to fall into darkness, her vision of the water moving around her began to blur. It became murky and hazed just like her thoughts and judgement had. Riko still stared up though, still trying to see any light of hope. Only to be met once again with unending darkness, her hair now floating around her, surrounding her like vines. 

 

Riko felt...cold, tired from the coldness of the water seeping into her skin and tired from the excruciating pain from her lungs. However she didn't have to take this much longer. The freezing depths of the ocean finally deciding to finish her off, to relieve of from such cruel torture. Riko saw her last bubble of air escape from between her lips...then closed her eyes as unconsciousness met her. Her sight fading, to and meeting with pure black.

 

 

 


	3. Emotions Resurfacing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello. Riko's not dead and neither is this series. Please enjoy the chapter and I apologize for the wait.  
> To those of you that have already read the first two chapters before the posting of this one, I made an edit to Riko's age after researching more about Japanese schools. Riko is currently aged at 15 instead of 16.

Opening her eyes, Riko Sakurauchi found herself in darkness, silently floating on her back. As she reached out her hand, she felt nothing. All she heard was silence. She was left aimlessly staring into her shrouded, dark, surroundings.After a few minutes of laying idly a prickling sensation began to take over her senses. At first it first started at the tips of her finger and the ends of her toes. It was a cold and icy feeling that quickly took away any feeling of heat she had. Riko shivered as it began to quickly spread inwards, dropping in temperature with every passing second. Going up her arms and legs to finally reach her chest.

 

The pain she felt was excruciating. Screaming in agony, Riko felt as if her lungs were tearing apart, an icy burn of pain with each new rip. Her breathing now ragged, she clutched at her chest, desperately trying to hold in her cries, but to no avail as she screamed. This lasted for what seemed like several hours until the burning the subsided and was replaced with a painful throb. With her arms tightly hugging her knees, Riko was left crying into the silent void which held her captive, shivering from the cold and pain of her entire being. 

 

The world around her slowly began coming back into view, her surroundings gaining back their deep colors. She found herself back on the pier looking up at the night sky, the stars shining brightly above her. The pink hues in the clouds and the orange light from the setting sun having faded away and being replaced with heavy shadows  from the street lights and the pale light of the moon above her.

 

Sitting up and coughing violently, she felt a chill down her spine as the wind near the ocean was still blowing. She came to realize just how cold she was as the breeze mercilessly passed through her soaking wet clothes, chilling her to the bone. Putting herself into a kneeling position, Riko began to shake violently until a hand came to rest on her shoulder.

  

As she turned around, Riko was briefly met with a pair of bright blue eyes before being held in a tight embrace.

 

"Thank goodness you're alive...I was scared that I had lost you."

 

Riko was left stunned as those words penetrated throughout her entire being. They echoed through out her mind and rang through her heart. For most of her life, Riko had thought to herself that she was boring, that she worthless, that she was trash. She was just another empty can in the streets of Tokyo, waiting to be kicked aside or thrown away. She wasn't talented, she wasn't special, she wasn't anything. She was nothing. No one would miss her if she was gone. Not even her family would miss her. They haven't proper interacted with each other for years. No one would miss her. No one would care.

 

So why?

 

Why did that person, that stranger say that to her? Why did they hold her so tightly?...Why did they make it seem like Riko mattered? 

 

Numerous emotions swirled around inside her mind, twisting and turning like tornado, a hurricane. Blowing inside her was confusion, bewilderment, sadness, all of these whirled around in the storm...In the very center though, in the very  small eye of the storm, lay a single emotion. One that Riko hadn't felt in a such a long time...It was happiness.

 

Overcome with emotions, Riko let tears she didn't know she had run down the sides of her face. The stranger hugged her tighter as Riko finally brought her arms around them as well.

 

After a minute or two, they silently ended their hug. Riko shifted back a bit to give each other some space, a slight blush began to color her cheeks from embarrassment. Nervously twiddling her thumbs, she glanced in the person's direction to see them, a girl, rummaging through what appeared to be her school bag.

 

"Here borrow these." Pulling her hand out of her bag, the girl offered her a folded set of clothing. "Don't want you getting sick. You know?" she smiled warmly. 

 

"Ah, no thank you...I shouldn't..." Riko said just above a whisper. 

 

"I insist," she said she while pushing the clothes into Riko's hands. "Let me know when you're finished changing."

 

The girl then rotated herself to face away from Riko.

 

"...Thank you." 

 

After putting the clothes to the side, Riko removed the blue ribbon around her neck and began to unbutton her blazer and white blouse, stripping off the wet uniform that stuck coldly to her body. She then took the clothes the girl had offered her, finding it was a gym set made up of a white shirt and a red jacket with pants.  Putting it on, Riko began to feel the warmth finally start coming back to her body. 

 

"Umm, you can look now."

 

"Ah, alright. Here. You can use this for your hair."

 

Riko looked to see the girl turning around and extending a towel to her. She looked at the girl and saw that even though her face radiated that same warm expression, she saw that everything else from her ashen hair, to her uniform were flattened and dripping with water. Although, her smile did not falter, Riko knew she too must be freezing as she watched droplets of water run down her face and fall onto the wooden pier, collecting into a puddle beneath her. 

 

"...Why?" Riko whispered. Her eyes were focused on the floor as she now held her knees against her chest. 

 

"Excuse me?" 

 

"Did you save me?" As Riko said this, she noticed that her voice was trembling. 

 

"I-"

 

"Why? Why are you being so kind to me?"

 

"Well-"

 

"Why are you doing this?!-" Riko shouted, surprised by her own volume. She was confused. She was so confused. Turning towards the girl, she looked directly in her eyes. She felt tears once again start to trickle down, but she didn't look away. She had to know this. She had to know the answer.

 

"...Because you needed it."  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Thank you for reading the latest chapter of this series and Happy Valentines day. I know posting this chapter on this particular holiday may feel out of place, but I hope you stilled enjoyed it and look forward to where this story will lead you. Still being hopeful, I predict such a long hiatus won't happen in the future.
> 
> To be honest, I had quite a large chunk of this chapter already written when the 2nd chapter was initially posted...Which was months ago. However, partly due to life's ever changing events, and partly due to a writers block, accompanied by an unsatisfaction with the attempts I had when I tried to continue the chapter, it was in a state of incompletion. However, I saw that despite it being hidden under piles of other good stories, some of you still read and commented about it. It made me happy that you would read it, so thank you.
> 
> I finally got over my over my block and edited what I had and wrote out the rest of this chapter (even though I'm still tentative). I also made some edits to the previous chapters besides changing Riko's age. They're not major. Mostly just grammar correction. So, once again, thank you for reading. 
> 
> On a humorous note to end this on, I've often thought of this story in comparison a block of Swiss cheese. I know where this story will eventually lead, its major plot points and events I want to write out, and it's (for me at least) enjoyable. However, there are some areas with holes, which in this case, I shall do my best to fix.
> 
> Thank you to those who read this enormous Author's Note. I hope your day goes well.


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